Life! I Want To Be Here...

Saturday, March 3rd;

I was at work and around 4:30 during lunch I began to experience a lump in my throat. Like taking your thumb and pushing in right at the "hole". As I went back to my department I described a feeling of my lungs hurting to my immediate boss, Gina. She left at 5:00 and I was on my own. As I was working I began to experience shortness of breath along with the other stuff and terrible heartburn (which I had been experiencing for 2 days already). If I moved too fast I would feel lightheaded (no nausea tho') and I also started to experience disorientation; I could barely concentrate on a simple task and my nightly routine was another thing I couldn't keep in order.

At 6:00 p.m. Mike came in after he got off work and it seemed the moment I saw him I just 'let go', felt secure, you know? I told him to call Kevin and describe my symptoms and to call the hospital to see if I should go in, Kevin said I needed to get to the E.R. immediately--twice. I called a floor supervisor and told them (and I had already called them earlier to ask if I could go home early because I wasn't feeling well) that I was dropping everything and that my son was here and I was headed to the E.R.

Got to the E.R. at 6:30--got lost because I couldn't recognize things in the dark--they took me in and hooked me up with the ekg, took about 3 vials of blood and proceeded to monitor me. They gave me one nitro glycerin pill and within seconds it took away all the symptoms for about a half an hour. They gave me another one and that lasted for 30 minutes as well. Then they gave me a cocktail of Maalox and xylocain to numb the esophagus and that was the one that stopped all of them. They then suggested it was either angina or spasms of the esophagus and I was to stay there until 10:30 when they would take another blood sample to be sure. I was discharged at midnight and everything stable.

I have a doctors’ appointment on March 14^th, 2012 for further information.

The Blessings of Old Friends

What a wonderful gift friends are.  Sometimes when friends separate due to life’s interference, the friendship fades away. The memories are still there, the love and caring is still there, but the people are miles and ‘times’ away.

Some of the wonderful things about the internet, email and Facebook are that you can still feel “right there” so that when you do get a chance touch base with your friends, it feels just like they or you never left.  This day I had the chance to reconnect with one of my very special friends in life, Laura.  I stayed with her at her house when I visited Alaska last year.  Laura is a very sweet soul, kind-hearted, giving, funny and loyal.  You don’t get too many of those in your lifetime.

Laura’s daughter lives in Redmond, about 20 minutes north of Bend and she was down here “on the outside” visiting.  I told her I would take her out to lunch, my treat, so we could have a little time together.  All Laura had to do was give me the address and I would enter it into my GPS and that those directions would lead me right to Kimmie’s front door.  Oh I would have never found Kimmie’s place with pen and paper, I am directionally dyslexic.  I don’t know if that’s a word but it IS a condition. 

So when I showed up and rang the doorbell, Laura opened the door and the first thing she said was, “You made it!  It worked!”, her expression was cute.

She invited me in and we sat in Kimmie’s living room and had a soda, chatted for awhile and took some pictures and off we went to have lunch at Mazatlan.  We celebrated and saluted our friendship and meeting with a wonderfully delicious margarita.   We then ordered CHICKEN chimichangas but when they arrived, they both were beef!  We just thought the heck with it, we didn’t want to wait anymore and they were good so we let that one go.

Of course, the visit wasn’t long enough and we soon had to part—mainly because the both of us got the ‘sleepies’ and we wanted to go home and take a nap!  Ah, the graciousness of true good friends…

I’ll see you again Laura, and thank you for being my friend.  

Yay Snow!!

Snow, finally.  It has been a long and ugly winter.  Nice and cold, not too bad as winters go, but relatively snow-free until the 28th of February/first of March, then it melted and now snow again on the 12th.  Mostly sunny skies and a bleak, coffee brown landscape.  I'll call it the come and go snow season.
There they stood in the box in my room.  Snowshoes.  Patiently waiting to be exercised again.  Just waiting.  Once in awhile I thought I could hear them scratching the sides of their long, dark cardboard tomb.  But that was just my imagination.
And then on that Thursday, the 1st of March, I hauled them out of storage, stepped outside into the bright sunshine and strapped them on before the snow could melt.  I didn't want to miss this one!
They say that you can burn 500 calories in an hour while snowshoeing.  You can burn 200 calories just trying to get them on!  It took a few times of rearranging my feet and the shoes before I finally remembered which way they were supposed to go.  Next time, I'll take pictures and create my own directions of "How To Put On Snowshoes". You know, "TGIF", as in toes-go-in-front.
I was almost feeling guilty that I wasn't up on the mountain, really getting my workout.  On the other hand, I have two acres of my own to plow around and I live two miles from the state park AND I saved gas by NOT driving 40+ miles to go 'hike'.  I really did walk around the property and as soon as I finished that, I didn't have any more trip guilt.  Then I took off up the snowy road we live on and walked about a half a mile--there and back--and was thoroughly guilt free.  You don't have to drive miles and miles to go have fun or get that workout, you can do it right in your own front yard!  And with all that snow and the beautiful day, it was just as wonderful as going out into the wilderness, except the coffee is a lot closer.  I am sure I earned that 500 calorie donut by the time I clomped back up on the deck.
Cheers!

Catching Up With March!

MARCH. March. MARCH!

Man, has March come in with a slam bang and woke me up!  I’m not sure if it’s because I haven’t had time to write or just couldn’t get my ‘stuff’ together.  Now all of a sudden there is a lot to talk about.

Beginning in February, I created (along with Kevin’s help) a book for Evan and Eric.  It started out as a day trip down to Fort Rock and somehow or another, two little stuffed critters; one a small white bear and the other a small white reindeer, came along on the trip and the story was born in the driveway.  I placed Reiny and Harty on the dashboard of the truck, their arms intertwined and the story began with, “Well Reiny, are we going on an adventure today?”  As they lay on the dashboard, their faces looking up at the sky, they saw animals in the cloud shapes.  Arriving in the area of Fort Rock, we took pictures of them sitting on top of the truck, looking off into the distance with the big bowl of Fort Rock in front of them.  Then next idea was to have “the boys” CLIMB and summit Fort Rock, a small reference to the accomplishment of Evan and Eric’s mommy and daddy summiting South Sister in 2011.  Oh and they found ‘caves’ and talked of monsters, they read placards describing local frontiersmen.  And when the little guys had finished their descent, they went on to stop at a local café for refreshments and to replenish their strength. 

I hear the REAL boys love their new book.  I can’t wait to read it to them, too.  Or maybe Evan can read it to me by the next visit, which is another story in itself.

A Very "Walton's Left It To Beaver's Father Knows Best" Christmas....

  
 When I was a young girl "back in the day", the tv shows we all used to watch were Father Knows Best, Ozzie and Harriet, Leave It To Beaver and The Andy Griffith Show.  All programs that portrayed the American family as loving and caring, forgiving, teaching with kindness, moral stories abounding, good triumphing over evil, etc., etc.  I guess as a kid, I thought every body had a fairly happy homelife just like those families on tv.  As an adult I have come to know and hear the stories of real life. 
Hard knocks, sadness, illness and death, loves lost and life changes, families broken, all things I have been fortunate enough to experience.
Yes, fortunate.  If I had never known those things I could not share empathy and love with my closest of friends, I could not hold someone elses' hand and share the tears of pain or be a good listener.  And I could not know or appreciate the good times that would come in my life. 
This Christmas of 2011 was celebrated with joy and love and memories that I will cherish until my soul departs this planet for heaven.  This Christmas, a long, long time coming, was one full of all those tv holidays that I had always wished to have.  There was no drama.  There was no fighting.  There were no little games between rivals or siblings being played.  Everyone was together to celebrate the very reason for this holiday.  Jesus would have been very happy at this gathering, indeed.

It has been close to 15 years since I have had a family together at Christmas time.  What made me decide to write about this was that I had been watching an old re-run of the "A Walton Christmas" where all the kids try to return home for the holiday.  The grandparents get trapped in town because of the snow and their old Model T just isn't capable of trekking through the snow.  As it goes, not all the family members make it home for various reasons and the rest of the story is about how they spend their holiday describing what Christmas is about and what it means to them.     

This Christmas I had my husband, my son, my daughter, her two precious little boys and my wonderful in-laws .  The weather was bright and sunshiny in Portland (where only 3 years ago they were so snowed in no one could travel in or out of the neighborhood!), the table had been set for days patiently waiting the arrival of visitors.  And we came, one by one.  Kevin, Mike and I arrived around 10:30 a.m. Christmas morning and shortly after that we heard the door bell ring.  There before the great grandparents and the grandparents were two very properly dressed young men; both Evan and Eric were sporting shirts and vests and ties.  They were so handsome!   

                             

The house was warm and smelled wonderful, a turkey in the oven, snack plates of cheese and crackers and a selection of various cookies on the kitchen buffet counter.  Fresh coffee brewing in the corner while snippets of conversation between the ages were interrupted with laughter and giggles and even an occasional plinking from the piano in the living room.   As many as there were of us, everything went rather smoothly.  Everyone gathered in the family room to open presents while Evan announced he could read now and figured out quickly which ones were his!  A quick blur of Christmas paper wrappings flying, the kids passing out the presents and lots of ooohs and awes and thank yous amidst the hustle.  Just pure joy with everyone together sharing this family day.

Once all the presents had been opened and the little guys were busy with their toys and games, the adults forwarded their attentions to getting the food on the table and ready for serving.

How absolutely wonderful to have all these generations sharing our family love and celebratory repast.

One of the most endearing moments was when Eric decided he didn't just want a few pieces of turkey on his plate, he wanted the WHOLE thing!  Dad convinced him that he couldn't fit the whole turkey on his plate and satisfied Eric's desire with a big turkey wing, complete with skin.  Eric seemed rather happy with that until the wing was placed on his plate where he quickly stated that he now wanted all that "stuff" off.  Ahhh, such big problems we should all have, 'eh?

We cleared the table of plates and silverware to make room for Kevin's famous homemade pumpkin pie paired with vanilla ice cream and fresh hot coffee.  Each of us were immersed in conversation with someone and various subjects bounced around the table.  At one time Mike was explaining some components of his cell phone or the computer to Dorothy (GeeGeeMom), Gread Granddad was discussing politics with Bret and Sara and Mike were bantering with each other and the boys.  Kevin and I were simply enjoying the whole scene.

Shortly after the plates were cleared and the dishes were washed, I found this little guy on the sofa...

I guess that says it all. 

Happy New Year!

2011 In Review

      Gee, I keep thinking that this year went by so fast and when I look at photo folders in Picasa, it DID!  Lots of things have happened and I know I would have forgotten about half of them if I hadn’t kept a photo journal.

      There wasn’t much going on in January other than snow, which is a good thing because one January we barely had any, which amounted to no snow fun!  I did manage to get my snow shoes on in February and ventured out to Dutchman Flats with a group called “Silver Striders”.   You know, for the over 50 crowd.   It was a lot of fun but boy, four miles round trip on snow shoes is not as easy as it looks.   

      In March and April Kevin and I made a couple of trips down to Dorris, Calif., where my parents had bought a 2 acre parcel of property way back in 1966.  I was with mom and dad when they drove up to see it and that is the LAST time anyone of us set foot on it.  Until 2011.   The first trip down we were not able to locate the property but I had a sense of being close to it.  The next trip down we did find it and we had brought with us a time capsule container filled with the local daily newspaper which include the wedding pictures of Prince William and Princess Kate, I also included the story of the property and the family and included the names of my children and two grandsons.  Maybe one day they will be the ones to rediscover that piece of family history and set another generations’ feet upon that soil. 

      In May I made a trip to Alaska, my first since leaving there in 2005.  I was able to visit with a few good friends, tread the old Kenai beach that I used to love and smell that fresh Alaskan air.  I also discovered that I wasn’t as ‘homesick’ for it as I thought.  It was lovely to be there again but it wasn’t the same, that’s for sure.

      Finally summer arrived, late this year but so great fully accepted when it did; the sunshine blew away the cloudy attitude and Kevin and I attacked the waters of the area with a vengeance!  I was able to visit “Lost Lake” on the Santiam Pass with a girlfriend, one I’d always wanted to “get on” every time we drove by it.  Check that one off my list now…

So I dipped the kayak in Davis Lake, then another little unnamed pond just off of Wickiup Reservoir and then finally IN Wickiup.  Hmm, after that my work sort of yanked me away from the fun! 

Along comes searing hot July and a wonderful visit with a long-ago friend, Debbie Hart, whom I hadn’t seen in about ten years.  Years and years ago when our kids were little (one of hers and one of mine were 5) we were “single wives”, we supported each other emotionally, mentally and sometimes physically.  We went on picnics with the kids, we had dinner at each others’ houses, yakked on the phone, drove to town, listened to each others’ worries and fears and we laughed together a lot, too.  Debbie and I were able to meet up with each other at my in-laws’ home in Portland, and it was a tear-jerker reunion!  As soon as Kevin and I pulled into the driveway, mom and dad and Debbie and her husband Don came outside, I cranked open the car door and flew out to hug my old and dear, dear friend!  My throat was literally closed; all I could do was cry tears of joy.  Now THAT’S a friend…

What little was left of the summer we tried to fill with planting flowers, pulling weeds, jumping on the water with the kayaks, mowing, visiting with the grandsons, getting more water time with the kayaks and then it was over all too soon, it just seemed to take forever for it to get here!  I still love the changing seasons, tho’.

      There are two kickers to this year; we were able to have Evan and Eric for an overnighter without MOM AND DAD for the first time!  We loved it!  While Bret and Sara were hiking, camping and summiting South Sister, the boys played outside on their dirt pile, jumped in the pool or played on the swing set.  One of the days Kpaw and me (Beema) took them for a hike in our state park, we wore them out!  But oh how we enjoyed the time we had with them. 

The last big kicker was driving over to Butte, Montana for the last time to pick up Mike and bring him home to Oregon.  I was able to visit with another old friend, Judy, whom I have known for 20 years now.  We enjoyed a few hours sitting in her hot tub on a frosty night watching the stars and the lights glitter down in the valley below.  I left Judy’s the morning of the 9^th of November, nose pointed east and within hours I was nosed west again, this time with my son in the car.

We decided to make it a bit of an adventure while we could so our first destination was Seattle, Washington.  It took almost 12 hours to get there and when we did, we got a bit lost in downtown with all the high rises and crazy lights and street lanes!  It was a unanimous decision to get a motel on the outskirts and then return in the morning to tour Pikes’ Public Market.  We hit a McDonalds’, planted our heads in our pillows and rose early the next morning in order to have a little fun before the rest of the long drive.  Mike and I were able to wander around the area of the Space Needle (we didn’t go up since they wanted $18.00 a person!); we jumped on the monorail and rode to the market area with a two hour window to wander around before returning for the rail ride back. It was just the right amount of time.  Once again, two noses were pointed south for a quick stop to see Sara and her little family, and then we hit the road again for the final three and a half hour drive home.

So far, the weather hasn’t been too bad and Mike has made great efforts to find employment and a place of his own.  

I am constantly telling myself to take my camera with me EVERY WHERE I GO.  Just a few days ago I missed a rare opportunity to get a shot of a beautiful, huge bull elk cantering across the road a short way from home.  I did stop the car and watch his graceful exit, muttering all the while, “Why don’t I have my camera??!”  So even at this ripe old age, I can still say I’m learning new things.

On that note, have a wonderful and merry Christmas and may you be blessed with all His glory and love.

 

In The Jumble, The Techno Jumble, The Lady Roars Tonight

I am trying to remember where it all began. You know, that frustration with technology. I was sitting in the living room of a log cabin in Alaska sometime in the fall around 2003, fiddling with one of three tv remotes. Each one had it's home place so I could simply pick one up and use it in whatever order was required.
And of course the day came when they happened to be in a 'remote jumble' and I knew this was going to be a mess for me. When it comes to machinery or electronics, I am the proverbial dummy. "Honey, I can't get the lawnmower to start and I've yanked and yanked on that ropey string thingy!"...MAN walks over to lawnmower and it starts. Car turns over with the first ignition turn. Washing machines act the way it is supposed to. You know the drill.
As my psychological stress level grew with each remote that I picked up I let loose with, "Whatever happened to just ON and OFF??!! I just want to turn the tv on!!" Little did I know that was only the beginning of my mechanical-brain demise..
Fast forward to 2011, a homey little laundry room in rural La Pine, Oregon.
There are two central figures; one is a non-descript white, front-loading washing machine and the other is me. For months I've been complaining about how the washing machine has a mind of it's own and we are at war. One of the many things I don't like about this object is the fact that it has a complete lock on my life from the moment I push the wash button to the last turn in the final spin cycle. Every now and then I forget and leave something in a pocket of my work apron or a pair of jeans, etc., and I know this because the item ends up sitting right there on the washers' window sill. Staring at me. Lip gloss gets sucked out of it's container and goes-who-knows-where but the little tube sits there waiting, watching me. I hear it through ESP, "You can't get me!" Or a note I needed for later is slowly shredded right before my eyes, in the window of that confounded machine. No, you can't stop it and open the door. It is locked and loaded and all inside belongs to it until it gives up it's final tumble.
But lately The Machine has been acting odd; once in awhile it won't spin all the water out and the clothes are dripping wet when I go to remove them; this requires shoving everything back in and resetting the spin cycle, another twenty minutes of lock-down. In the last week, The Machine has been getting hung up on a cycle and this requires a complete shut down so the ELECTRONIC (!) memory chip can reconfigure. Or whatever the heck it does when it's "off" for another twenty minutes. But just a few days ago I had had enough when the last cycle was stuck on spin. It was not a house rattling, floor-shaking spin but a geri..at..ric r...o...l...l for FORTY FIVE MINUTES!! I stomped out into the living room and announced to 'MAN' that I was going to pick that washer up and throw it out into the back yard! 'Man' had that what-the-heck-is-wrong-now look and after several minutes of stomping and threatening and mumbling under my breath and Man walking in and starting the washer with NO problem, I am now expecting a new washer and dryer next week. A top loader. One I can stop whenever I want and take out things I forgot shouldn't be in that load, or retrieve that just remembered lip gloss or put bleach or softener in.
That funny little voice of "Whatever happened to ON/OFF?" popped into my head after all these years. Now it starts with what happened to SIMPLE? I noted on facebook (okay, a modern technological wonder) the other day that all I wanted was a machine that washes clothes. I don't want it to massage my feet, walk the dog, wash the car or cook dinner. I just want clean clothes in less than 30 minutes and I don't want to put a second mortgage on my house to buy one.
I am now going to be the proud mama of a SIMPLE washer and dryer next week. I am a happy WOMAN now.